A n emergency meeting of the International Council of Thirst Journalists was convened over Zoom today after paparazzi photos of Normal People star and hottie Paul Mescal broke through the malaise of the internet in a manner not unlike his character Connell’s hidden emotional depths bursting through his emotionally stunted exterior at various points in his tumultuous relationship with Marianne.
While experts are in agreement that the photo of the Hulu series star is chef’s kiss there has been heated debated amongst members of the International Council of Thirst Journalists about exactly why this photo is so hot and tempting. Breakout rooms devolved into chaos, people angrily pressed the “Leave Meeting” button in a huff, strong words were delivered over muted mics. The Council may never recover, yet we are no closer to an answer. But we do have some theories and, hopefully, we can use them to rebuild some semblance of an orderly and thirst-oriented society. We will not be broken by a photo of Paul Mescal, five-foot-eleven max morning height, strutting down the street with bedhead, no matter how quixotically hot we find it. Let’s investigate.